Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Memory Lane...With a Twist
Today has been one of those glorious days that we moms get to experience with our children every once in a while. Not often enough, in my opinion. So many days are full of chores, errands, discipline, or even sheer monotony that it becomes difficult to remember how truly blessed we are. Just last evening I was telling my husband that the dinnertime hour is my least favorite time of the day. Even declaring that makes me sad because I have such fond dinnertime memories from my childhood. Good food, laughter, stories...being together! But, with 4 children still so young (and most of them still picky-eaters) we are not at the wonderful, relaxed, dinnertime hour...just yet! Even while I am busy preparing delicious and healthy meals, I know without a doubt, that someone will complain, whine, or ask if they have to eat what I've made. Then, we enter the actual sit-down-to-dinner-together meal and the work of being parents is in full-force. Manners, messes, arguments over vegetables, a whining toddler who won't eat and instead tries to throw her plate (good thing this mommy has mad-reflexes!) and the list goes on. Not to mention the cleanup in the kitchen, the dining room, and under the table following dinner! Okay, you get the point! Not my favorite hour--though I hold high hopes for the future! So that's how parenting is so often--diligent, tough work--but now and then you have glorious times!
Back to my original thought! This morning was one such time. We headed to one of our favorite parks right away after breakfast and brushing teeth. My oldest son, now 8, has become such a helper, so he headed to the garage to get the blue stroller (not the small purple umbrella one) and opened the van doors for the other kids. I envisioned playing, walks, stopping for a snack, a coffee for me on the way--a good time! As Jaden pushed the stroller to the side of the van where I was getting my little one out, I realized he did not get the blue stroller with the storage space for my backpack and drinks. He got the umbrella stroller. No room for drinks, sunscreen, snacks, or diapers! And I had pants with no pockets! The backpack has a broken strap! I then realized we would have a much shorter visit at the park, right? No, that's not what happened at all. We had a long, glorious morning at the park!
The weather was cooler than it's been and the mosquitoes were not out. No one was at the playground for our first playtime. We had the equipment and space to ourselves. My 4 year old, who has a tendency to become quite whiny, did absolutely no whining! Really! None! We decided to head off for our usual walk down the boardwalk bridge to the creek where the kids love to throw rocks, leaves, and sticks through the slats of the covered bridge. Usually the walk ends there and we head back the way we came. But today everyone, including my inclined-to-whine-Ella, was happy to take an even longer walk. We strolled and took our time--it was so nice and leisurely! It was glorious! We all enjoyed each other's company as well as nature's beauty.
It got even better for me. We headed to the lovely garden beside the historic manor house we've visited before. I began to tell the kids (although maybe we've told them before) that this was the very place Mommy and Daddy came to have our pictures taken when we were married. They've seen our wedding pictures. And I'm pretty sure they've walked through that garden before. But suddenly, such a wave of emotion came over me! Amazement. Thankfulness. Awe. I was walking down my own memory lane...with a twist. An amazing, beautiful twist! As I pointed to one of the gazebos where Ron and I had posed for a picture, I thought about some of the dreams, hopes, and visions that were inside both of us on that beautiful day. And here I was, back at that same magical place, with four of those dreams right by my side. Awestruck! Completely overwhelmed with the glorious, miraculous magic of how our lives unfold.
I'll tell you what: if God never does one more thing for me in this life, I'm overwhelmed with thankfulness for that which He's already done. I realize that every parent may not have a similar opportunity--to walk with their children in the specific place where their union became real. But, I do believe if we are willing to slow down once in a while; to stroll leisurely; to purpose to take our time enjoying our children, we will have opportunities to be overwhelmed with the realization of the miracle that they are. Further, I believe that all of us can experience such moments of deep and grateful realization, even if we do not have children. Life is so much more precious when we take the time to slow down, enjoy it, and treasure simple moments. The magic for me was in the simple moments of this day. Dinnertime may continue to be a bust for a few years, but I aim to slow down and enjoy more and more the four beautiful gifts God gave me.
Back to my original thought! This morning was one such time. We headed to one of our favorite parks right away after breakfast and brushing teeth. My oldest son, now 8, has become such a helper, so he headed to the garage to get the blue stroller (not the small purple umbrella one) and opened the van doors for the other kids. I envisioned playing, walks, stopping for a snack, a coffee for me on the way--a good time! As Jaden pushed the stroller to the side of the van where I was getting my little one out, I realized he did not get the blue stroller with the storage space for my backpack and drinks. He got the umbrella stroller. No room for drinks, sunscreen, snacks, or diapers! And I had pants with no pockets! The backpack has a broken strap! I then realized we would have a much shorter visit at the park, right? No, that's not what happened at all. We had a long, glorious morning at the park!
The weather was cooler than it's been and the mosquitoes were not out. No one was at the playground for our first playtime. We had the equipment and space to ourselves. My 4 year old, who has a tendency to become quite whiny, did absolutely no whining! Really! None! We decided to head off for our usual walk down the boardwalk bridge to the creek where the kids love to throw rocks, leaves, and sticks through the slats of the covered bridge. Usually the walk ends there and we head back the way we came. But today everyone, including my inclined-to-whine-Ella, was happy to take an even longer walk. We strolled and took our time--it was so nice and leisurely! It was glorious! We all enjoyed each other's company as well as nature's beauty.
It got even better for me. We headed to the lovely garden beside the historic manor house we've visited before. I began to tell the kids (although maybe we've told them before) that this was the very place Mommy and Daddy came to have our pictures taken when we were married. They've seen our wedding pictures. And I'm pretty sure they've walked through that garden before. But suddenly, such a wave of emotion came over me! Amazement. Thankfulness. Awe. I was walking down my own memory lane...with a twist. An amazing, beautiful twist! As I pointed to one of the gazebos where Ron and I had posed for a picture, I thought about some of the dreams, hopes, and visions that were inside both of us on that beautiful day. And here I was, back at that same magical place, with four of those dreams right by my side. Awestruck! Completely overwhelmed with the glorious, miraculous magic of how our lives unfold.
I'll tell you what: if God never does one more thing for me in this life, I'm overwhelmed with thankfulness for that which He's already done. I realize that every parent may not have a similar opportunity--to walk with their children in the specific place where their union became real. But, I do believe if we are willing to slow down once in a while; to stroll leisurely; to purpose to take our time enjoying our children, we will have opportunities to be overwhelmed with the realization of the miracle that they are. Further, I believe that all of us can experience such moments of deep and grateful realization, even if we do not have children. Life is so much more precious when we take the time to slow down, enjoy it, and treasure simple moments. The magic for me was in the simple moments of this day. Dinnertime may continue to be a bust for a few years, but I aim to slow down and enjoy more and more the four beautiful gifts God gave me.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
A Spiritual Time-Out
Earlier I sent my 8 year old to his room to take some time alone and talk to God. His attitude had gone from just okay to downright not nice. He was falling apart over little things and not responding well to anyone. I told him he needed to just take some time and make things right between him and God, and that he could not come out of his room until he had done this. About 15 minutes later, while I was in the shower (door open, mind you!) listening to my daughters slamming their bedroom door over and over and over, I thought, "I wish I had sent myself to my room to talk to God!" If only, right?
Nothing about my day started out great. I woke up to my 2 year old screaming and crying. As I entered her room, I smelled the offense! She has experimented with removing her own diaper recently. This time, something happened soon after for which she was ill-prepared. She was trapped at one side of her bed absolutely terrified at what was laying on the other side! Okay! Bath time bright and early! Laundry to follow.
After breakfast, I agreed to let the kids build a monstrous house out of every cushion, pillow, chair, blanket, and book in the house, accepting that I would use the living room space for my workout this evening instead of this morning. Shortly after this process began is when my son's attitude took a turn for the worse. He's a perfectionist with very big visions; when he can't make the visions a reality, he becomes easily frustrated. Meanwhile, my printer misprinted and ruined at least 4 pretty valuable coupons. I realize this isn't a life or death issue, but when you're a single income family, saving money is key! My online banking website also seemed to be having an off day, but when I finally reached it I realized that a check written weeks ago had not cashed. It was now past due! Beautiful! (Please forgive the sarcasm.) So, I could hope that my insurance company would practice some decency; that after I submitted an online payment, should they receive a check that they contact me before cashing it. But, I don't have that much faith in insurance companies. So, I sat on the phone with a very courteous bank representative who kindly stopped the payment of my check to the small tune of thirty-five dollars! Yippee! Well, at least that's done!
So, fast forward to my epiphany in the shower that I really wish I'd sent myself to my room to talk to God. The reality is, that is exactly what I needed and need to do! At least, in a sense. So, maybe I can't actually remove myself entirely from my young children's presence for 20 minutes to go to my room for a real time-out, but I can take a spiritual time-out whenever I am smart enough to realize I need one. This can be as simple as stopping, breathing, and refocusing on God, "the one in whom our hope should rest in quiet confidence all along." Yes, all the little frustrations of the day are valid. Each one was unexpected and irritating to some degree. But, is it the end of the world? Heck no! An early bath here, some extra laundry there, $35 here.... It is going to be alright! I would have realized that much earlier if I had simply taken a moment to remind myself of the one who holds my world in His hands.
I had enough time and insight to afford my son the opportunity to go remind himself of the one who cares for him. He could have taken two minutes or an hour and it wouldn't have mattered to me! I just wanted him to take a spiritual time-out so that his day would get better and not worse. Not surprisingly, he came downstairs after about 30 minutes and gave me a hug and apologized for his attitude. I knew he had talked to God! I never told him he needed to apologize to me. But, this time of quiet meditation or prayer with His heavenly Father was all he needed to redirect his path. He has been just fine ever since. I will be too. I have taken a few moments to quiet myself and place my cares in my Father's hands. (They're much bigger than mine--He can hold an awful lot!) I know I can't fix every aggravating thing that happens in my life, and I really don't expect God to either. But, I know that if I quietly remind myself, in the middle of life's aggravations, that God cares for me and sees the end as well as the beginning, I can handle just about anything.
*quote by Candy Chand, Gift of Grace
Nothing about my day started out great. I woke up to my 2 year old screaming and crying. As I entered her room, I smelled the offense! She has experimented with removing her own diaper recently. This time, something happened soon after for which she was ill-prepared. She was trapped at one side of her bed absolutely terrified at what was laying on the other side! Okay! Bath time bright and early! Laundry to follow.
After breakfast, I agreed to let the kids build a monstrous house out of every cushion, pillow, chair, blanket, and book in the house, accepting that I would use the living room space for my workout this evening instead of this morning. Shortly after this process began is when my son's attitude took a turn for the worse. He's a perfectionist with very big visions; when he can't make the visions a reality, he becomes easily frustrated. Meanwhile, my printer misprinted and ruined at least 4 pretty valuable coupons. I realize this isn't a life or death issue, but when you're a single income family, saving money is key! My online banking website also seemed to be having an off day, but when I finally reached it I realized that a check written weeks ago had not cashed. It was now past due! Beautiful! (Please forgive the sarcasm.) So, I could hope that my insurance company would practice some decency; that after I submitted an online payment, should they receive a check that they contact me before cashing it. But, I don't have that much faith in insurance companies. So, I sat on the phone with a very courteous bank representative who kindly stopped the payment of my check to the small tune of thirty-five dollars! Yippee! Well, at least that's done!
So, fast forward to my epiphany in the shower that I really wish I'd sent myself to my room to talk to God. The reality is, that is exactly what I needed and need to do! At least, in a sense. So, maybe I can't actually remove myself entirely from my young children's presence for 20 minutes to go to my room for a real time-out, but I can take a spiritual time-out whenever I am smart enough to realize I need one. This can be as simple as stopping, breathing, and refocusing on God, "the one in whom our hope should rest in quiet confidence all along." Yes, all the little frustrations of the day are valid. Each one was unexpected and irritating to some degree. But, is it the end of the world? Heck no! An early bath here, some extra laundry there, $35 here.... It is going to be alright! I would have realized that much earlier if I had simply taken a moment to remind myself of the one who holds my world in His hands.
I had enough time and insight to afford my son the opportunity to go remind himself of the one who cares for him. He could have taken two minutes or an hour and it wouldn't have mattered to me! I just wanted him to take a spiritual time-out so that his day would get better and not worse. Not surprisingly, he came downstairs after about 30 minutes and gave me a hug and apologized for his attitude. I knew he had talked to God! I never told him he needed to apologize to me. But, this time of quiet meditation or prayer with His heavenly Father was all he needed to redirect his path. He has been just fine ever since. I will be too. I have taken a few moments to quiet myself and place my cares in my Father's hands. (They're much bigger than mine--He can hold an awful lot!) I know I can't fix every aggravating thing that happens in my life, and I really don't expect God to either. But, I know that if I quietly remind myself, in the middle of life's aggravations, that God cares for me and sees the end as well as the beginning, I can handle just about anything.
*quote by Candy Chand, Gift of Grace
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
When All Is Green...
There is a song that my parents have always enjoyed, and we grew up hearing many times, called "Summertime and the Living is Easy." Have you heard it? It really is a catchy tune! You can just imagine yourself lounging near water on a beautiful, sunny, breezy summer day. There is just something about summer, isn't there? (Well, especially for all of my Midwest friends.) We feel the seasons and we find ourselves, at some point, longing for those summer days. And it's not only about school being out; it's not only about the long swims; it's not only about popsicles and ice cream sundaes (though a sundae sure sounds heavenly right now!). It's the whole thing! There's just something about summer...when all is green. Isn't that the way life is too? When the living is easy--when all is green--we do just fine!
I've been thinking about that in my life for several reasons recently. There's just something easier, more slow-paced and relaxing, when it's summertime. Sure, I still have responsibilities; I'm not even entirely finished with the home school year for my son. But, the living is easy! I only have to look out my windows and see all the green and I'm overwhelmed with joy, peace, and utter contentment! (Maybe it helps that green is my absolute favorite color!) I'm sad to see it go, and so happy to see it return! It's the whole picture really: the blue skies, the contrast of the green leaves, brown tree trunks, and the vibrant colors everywhere! I'm in awe of God's glory all around!
I'm not always completely at peace in my own skin when it comes to growing older. If I'm honest, I'll admit that there are times when I long for younger, more carefree days. There are times when my numerical age just annoys me, because I feel at least 10 years younger on the inside. However, one thing I so appreciate about growing older is that I've learned better how to embrace different seasons of my life. Not always. Not without some work and determination. But, I've learned that there is a time to rest and enjoy; there is a time to put my hand to the plow; there is a time to study, reflect, listen, and learn. Wisdom tells us that we benefit from paying attention to the season that we're in and do what needs to be done during that season. So, when all is green--when the living is easy, then great! But, when the living isn't so easy, it is time to take stock and direct our lives, our days, on purpose!
I've been reflecting on this concept, as I said before, in several realms of my life and the lives of others around me. I've considered relationships specifically. Whether it's the relationship I have with my spouse; or the relationship with my children; friends or others, I have to choose to pay attention on purpose. I need to take stock at times. You know, driving is a lot easier in the summer (as long as your AC doesn't quit on ya), but driving in the winter takes a lot more skill, caution, alertness, and patience. There may be adverse road conditions! Our relationships can be exactly the same. When I see adversity arise in any of these relationships, I owe it to myself and the other person, to take stock and develop a course of action.
I honestly don't think that many of the conditions in our relationships take us entirely by surprise. If we are paying attention, we see the warning signs. When my daughter is whining excessively, chances are she needs some one-on-one time; she needs me to slow down and pay attention to her. She needs me to put the vacuum away, come sit with her on the couch, snuggle, and read a book. She doesn't need me to put the vacuum away and move on to the next task on my to-do list, while fussing at her to stop her whining! And I'm guilty, all too often, of the latter. When my husband and I start bickering about the relatively insignificant details of our lives, we need a date night! We need time to truly reconnect; we need to remind ourselves why we are together, what the future holds, and what we love about our life together. And, if we can't have a date night out, we make one at home; we get coffee or take-out, and we spend time together...we do this often! When it's summertime, we can just run outside in shorts and flip flops and take a walk. When it's getting colder, we have to do much more preparation to even venture outdoors.
It's well and good to enjoy the summertime days of our lives. When it's lush and green, enjoy as you should! It's also okay to go through the other seasons. They each have a purpose and something to teach us. The key is to pay attention. We must! Every relationship in our life is depending on us paying attention to what season it is!
*quote by John Eldredge, Captivating
I've been thinking about that in my life for several reasons recently. There's just something easier, more slow-paced and relaxing, when it's summertime. Sure, I still have responsibilities; I'm not even entirely finished with the home school year for my son. But, the living is easy! I only have to look out my windows and see all the green and I'm overwhelmed with joy, peace, and utter contentment! (Maybe it helps that green is my absolute favorite color!) I'm sad to see it go, and so happy to see it return! It's the whole picture really: the blue skies, the contrast of the green leaves, brown tree trunks, and the vibrant colors everywhere! I'm in awe of God's glory all around!
"The earth in summer is brimming with beauty, beauty of such magnificence and variety and unembarrassed lavishness, ripe beauty, lush beauty, beauty given to us with such generosity and abundance it is almost scandalous."In summertime, the living truly is easier. In summertime moments of our lives, the living is easier too--no need to strive or work relentlessly. There is an easier flow or current to our days. The reality of our lives, however, is that it isn't always summer. The living isn't always easy. This is when the work needs to be done. This is when we have to take stock of exactly where we are and how we got here. And sometimes, we even need extra help in our journey! We're soaking in the rays of the sun during the summer; but in the bleak days of winter, we have to work purposely to warm ourselves. It's crucial for us to do what needs to be done when we aren't in summertime moments or days. If we have to work extra hard, or seek counsel, or evaluate and re-evaluate, then that is exactly what we should do! If we need to steer our boat in a different direction because a cold front is moving in, then that's what we'd better do! If we pay attention, we can surely see the warning signs that tell us it isn't summer any longer--or not for long.
I'm not always completely at peace in my own skin when it comes to growing older. If I'm honest, I'll admit that there are times when I long for younger, more carefree days. There are times when my numerical age just annoys me, because I feel at least 10 years younger on the inside. However, one thing I so appreciate about growing older is that I've learned better how to embrace different seasons of my life. Not always. Not without some work and determination. But, I've learned that there is a time to rest and enjoy; there is a time to put my hand to the plow; there is a time to study, reflect, listen, and learn. Wisdom tells us that we benefit from paying attention to the season that we're in and do what needs to be done during that season. So, when all is green--when the living is easy, then great! But, when the living isn't so easy, it is time to take stock and direct our lives, our days, on purpose!
I've been reflecting on this concept, as I said before, in several realms of my life and the lives of others around me. I've considered relationships specifically. Whether it's the relationship I have with my spouse; or the relationship with my children; friends or others, I have to choose to pay attention on purpose. I need to take stock at times. You know, driving is a lot easier in the summer (as long as your AC doesn't quit on ya), but driving in the winter takes a lot more skill, caution, alertness, and patience. There may be adverse road conditions! Our relationships can be exactly the same. When I see adversity arise in any of these relationships, I owe it to myself and the other person, to take stock and develop a course of action.
I honestly don't think that many of the conditions in our relationships take us entirely by surprise. If we are paying attention, we see the warning signs. When my daughter is whining excessively, chances are she needs some one-on-one time; she needs me to slow down and pay attention to her. She needs me to put the vacuum away, come sit with her on the couch, snuggle, and read a book. She doesn't need me to put the vacuum away and move on to the next task on my to-do list, while fussing at her to stop her whining! And I'm guilty, all too often, of the latter. When my husband and I start bickering about the relatively insignificant details of our lives, we need a date night! We need time to truly reconnect; we need to remind ourselves why we are together, what the future holds, and what we love about our life together. And, if we can't have a date night out, we make one at home; we get coffee or take-out, and we spend time together...we do this often! When it's summertime, we can just run outside in shorts and flip flops and take a walk. When it's getting colder, we have to do much more preparation to even venture outdoors.
It's well and good to enjoy the summertime days of our lives. When it's lush and green, enjoy as you should! It's also okay to go through the other seasons. They each have a purpose and something to teach us. The key is to pay attention. We must! Every relationship in our life is depending on us paying attention to what season it is!
*quote by John Eldredge, Captivating
Saturday, May 21, 2011
It's Just Like Riding a Bike!
We've all heard that cliche', "It's just like riding a bike!" People use this when they're trying to make the point that once you learn how to do something like ride, you never really forget. Even if it has been years since you have been on a bike, once you get back on, it all just comes back to you. There's no need to re-learn. Well, in case you think this is headed in a particular way, let me just say that it's much more simple than that. Over the last two days I've been thinking about that saying. Why? Because I got back on a bike. And, surprise, surprise! I didn't forget how to ride one!
It has been years since I have been on a bike. The last time prior to yesterday that I was on a bike was when my oldest son was just a baby. And that wasn't even my own bike; it was my sister-in-law's and the tire blew out on me. For one reason or another I just haven't been on a bike since then. But lately I have been getting the itch for one. I kept thinking just how much fun it would be for me to join my husband and kids in their spring, summer, and fall bike rides. They frequently go for rides; my husband attaches the bike trailer for my girls and the boys ride their bikes. During these times, I usually enjoy some me-time, but I've been wanting to join in. So yesterday, on a whim, I sent a text message to my husband: Hey! Why don't we go buy me an inexpensive bike and take the kids out for a bike ride later? His response: Sure! Why not? Well, I didn't waste any time (thanks to technology) hunting down the perfect bike, calling the store, and asking them to hold it for me!
I probably wasn't on that bike for thirty seconds before I was grinning and couldn't stop! Oh my goodness! How great it felt to ride a bike again! I had completely forgotten! Now, don't get me wrong, I do plenty of things for myself: I read, write, run, do yoga, and enjoy coffee dates with good friends. But, to do something as completely carefree and enjoyable as going for a bike ride....it had been too long! For me, this was complete bliss! We were blessed with a sunny Saturday (which is out of the ordinary in Northwest Ohio these days) so I sort of talked my family into another bike ride. We bribed the kids with a different location, a picnic, and some nearby water to throw rocks in! Well...we all enjoyed another bike ride. For me, once again...complete bliss!
I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only mom who has put her family's needs in the forefront and has momentarily forgotten what took her away as a child. My family's needs are a priority to me (as they should be) because my family is my first ministry. And, as I said before, I make sure that I get enough time to do things that I enjoy. But, I think in each of us there is something we remember doing so often as a child simply because we loved it. And maybe it was that same something that we could do to get away (even for a few moments) from realities that were tough: struggling in school, not fitting in, or even just the simple childhood disappointment of not getting to do or have something we wanted. We had something that could take us away! Well, I guess at this point in my grown-up life, I still have that child-like desire on the inside of me to just get away and forget about responsibilities or tough realities. I still desire to do something that feels--like it did as a child--completely blissful and carefree. I need that. Maybe it's just me, but I'm guessing that there are other grown-ups that feel this way too. We have no intention of shirking responsibilities, but it sure is nice to feel carefree and child-like again, even if for a few brief moments.
As a kid, riding a bike wasn't always entirely carefree. I do remember one incident in particular when I had my first bike accident. I was 8 and still pretty new at riding without training wheels (my boys learned when they were 4), and my older brother decided to help me ride more safely. We didn't ride with any helmets or protective gear then, as our kids do now, but my brother decided I needed a seat belt for my bike. I don't have a good recollection as to what this contraption looked like, but it wasn't all that genius. The only way it worked was to hold onto it with one hand (and I got to test it first!)...you see where this is going! Well, my newly acquired riding skills were put to the test here, and they failed me big time! I'm sure that my brother, to this day, would declare it operator-error (and there's certainly some truth to that) but I wasn't happy with him! The whole family gets a good laugh over this story whenever it is re-told at the dinner table. I'm sure my own children will have some good biking stories to re-tell as our family enjoys this activity together. I hope they will!
For just a split second before I got on my new bike yesterday, I wondered if I could still do it. Silly! I know! Then that old cliche' came to mind, "It's just like riding a bike." And, of course, it was. I was just fine. Actually, I was more than fine...yesterday and today. I was in my glory! I felt completely carefree and blissful! As I was gazing up at the trees and the blue sky while riding behind my son, I thought to myself, I need more of this in my life! Can you relate? Is there something you do or have done that leaves you feeling, somewhere deep on the inside of you--in that childlike part of you that we all have--I need more of this in my life? Maybe it's all the green that I saw over the last two days (and green is my favorite color). Maybe it's the way my cheeks and hair felt while the wind brushed past my face. Maybe it's the memories attached to riding a bike, or that I'm now enjoying this with my children. Whatever it is exactly, all I know is that I need more of this in my life!
It has been years since I have been on a bike. The last time prior to yesterday that I was on a bike was when my oldest son was just a baby. And that wasn't even my own bike; it was my sister-in-law's and the tire blew out on me. For one reason or another I just haven't been on a bike since then. But lately I have been getting the itch for one. I kept thinking just how much fun it would be for me to join my husband and kids in their spring, summer, and fall bike rides. They frequently go for rides; my husband attaches the bike trailer for my girls and the boys ride their bikes. During these times, I usually enjoy some me-time, but I've been wanting to join in. So yesterday, on a whim, I sent a text message to my husband: Hey! Why don't we go buy me an inexpensive bike and take the kids out for a bike ride later? His response: Sure! Why not? Well, I didn't waste any time (thanks to technology) hunting down the perfect bike, calling the store, and asking them to hold it for me!
I probably wasn't on that bike for thirty seconds before I was grinning and couldn't stop! Oh my goodness! How great it felt to ride a bike again! I had completely forgotten! Now, don't get me wrong, I do plenty of things for myself: I read, write, run, do yoga, and enjoy coffee dates with good friends. But, to do something as completely carefree and enjoyable as going for a bike ride....it had been too long! For me, this was complete bliss! We were blessed with a sunny Saturday (which is out of the ordinary in Northwest Ohio these days) so I sort of talked my family into another bike ride. We bribed the kids with a different location, a picnic, and some nearby water to throw rocks in! Well...we all enjoyed another bike ride. For me, once again...complete bliss!
I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only mom who has put her family's needs in the forefront and has momentarily forgotten what took her away as a child. My family's needs are a priority to me (as they should be) because my family is my first ministry. And, as I said before, I make sure that I get enough time to do things that I enjoy. But, I think in each of us there is something we remember doing so often as a child simply because we loved it. And maybe it was that same something that we could do to get away (even for a few moments) from realities that were tough: struggling in school, not fitting in, or even just the simple childhood disappointment of not getting to do or have something we wanted. We had something that could take us away! Well, I guess at this point in my grown-up life, I still have that child-like desire on the inside of me to just get away and forget about responsibilities or tough realities. I still desire to do something that feels--like it did as a child--completely blissful and carefree. I need that. Maybe it's just me, but I'm guessing that there are other grown-ups that feel this way too. We have no intention of shirking responsibilities, but it sure is nice to feel carefree and child-like again, even if for a few brief moments.
For just a split second before I got on my new bike yesterday, I wondered if I could still do it. Silly! I know! Then that old cliche' came to mind, "It's just like riding a bike." And, of course, it was. I was just fine. Actually, I was more than fine...yesterday and today. I was in my glory! I felt completely carefree and blissful! As I was gazing up at the trees and the blue sky while riding behind my son, I thought to myself, I need more of this in my life! Can you relate? Is there something you do or have done that leaves you feeling, somewhere deep on the inside of you--in that childlike part of you that we all have--I need more of this in my life? Maybe it's all the green that I saw over the last two days (and green is my favorite color). Maybe it's the way my cheeks and hair felt while the wind brushed past my face. Maybe it's the memories attached to riding a bike, or that I'm now enjoying this with my children. Whatever it is exactly, all I know is that I need more of this in my life!
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
20 Minutes to Reflect!
Here is the task: to write a blog in 20 minutes! Why? I don't have more time than that. Honestly! This day has been filled up with reorganizing toys; cleaning; home schooling my son; exercising; printing coupons; and trekking through a wet, puddled basement to complete a few loads of laundry. It has been another busy day at the Hinz house. Even through the clutter and chaos; through the dampness of the day (inside and out), my heart and my soul are at peace. This is the forever "thing" that I am wanting to pass on to my children as well. Life is so much better lived with peace!
We want to rent our home and move. We want to enlarge the area in which we live. We have many other short-term as well as long-term goals. But, each and every day this family's biggest goal is to live in peace. This peace is best achieved by contentment and joy. This joy is best arrived at by laughing at life and enjoying the quirks and goodness in one another. Our children are continually cracking us up! Just last night, while we were doing our bedtime routine, my sometimes emotional and occasionally cantankerous 3 yr. old said, in response to being corrected, "I don't trust anyone!" My husband and I just looked at each other completely astonished! I asked, "Ella, where in the world did you hear such a thing?" To which she replied while smiling, "In the Jungle Book." We were relieved! Then we had another good laugh! The things our kids pick up and pay attention to! Well, that's just it, isn't it? It is amazing what they pay attention to....and they are paying attention!
Knowing that my kids are paying attention, I want to grasp hold of each and every opportunity that presents itself to impart something good--something of lasting value--into their lives. When they show interest in something, I really want to take the time to talk further with them. When they have questions, I need to answer them! When they are showing me that they desperately need my attention, I need to give them...myself! They are watching; they are listening; they are paying close attention! They remember things that I sometimes don't. Just days ago, my 7 year old was retelling me of the time when my husband gave his coat to a man who was likely homeless, who was spending time around the dumpsters where my husband worked. It was winter and the man needed a coat. It seemed a simple, easy enough thing to do. My son was probably 2 or 3 years old when this took place and I really don't think we've talked about it since then. But, my son remembered because we did talk with him about it at the time; we told him how important it is to do something even when you are not sure there is much you can do. Apparently, this had a lasting impact on him!
So, my forever lesson and my forever prayer is that I am living in peace with my family, with my neighbors, and with myself! My children are paying attention to what I am doing and what I am saying. They see my reactions to life. They see the peace exemplified! And, they see when peace is not what I have chosen. We are continually living this life in front of our children, even when we are not sure what to do--or we don't feel we have enough time to do what needs to be done. They are watching! Young, impressionable lives are watching mine lived in front of them! Lord, help me to remember to love as You do! Help me remember to have peace in every circumstance. Allow me to live with joy and contentment all the days of my life. And, help me to take every opportunity to teach my children about what matters in this life. Help my children to see you in the every day circumstances!
My 20 minutes is up! My daughter is also up...from her nap, begging for a snack. Laundry needs folded; toys need picked up; Lego pieces need found; a phone call needs to be made; and dinner needs prepared. Life is busy and sometimes difficult to slow down. But, in the midst of my busy life....little lives are watching!
We want to rent our home and move. We want to enlarge the area in which we live. We have many other short-term as well as long-term goals. But, each and every day this family's biggest goal is to live in peace. This peace is best achieved by contentment and joy. This joy is best arrived at by laughing at life and enjoying the quirks and goodness in one another. Our children are continually cracking us up! Just last night, while we were doing our bedtime routine, my sometimes emotional and occasionally cantankerous 3 yr. old said, in response to being corrected, "I don't trust anyone!" My husband and I just looked at each other completely astonished! I asked, "Ella, where in the world did you hear such a thing?" To which she replied while smiling, "In the Jungle Book." We were relieved! Then we had another good laugh! The things our kids pick up and pay attention to! Well, that's just it, isn't it? It is amazing what they pay attention to....and they are paying attention!
Knowing that my kids are paying attention, I want to grasp hold of each and every opportunity that presents itself to impart something good--something of lasting value--into their lives. When they show interest in something, I really want to take the time to talk further with them. When they have questions, I need to answer them! When they are showing me that they desperately need my attention, I need to give them...myself! They are watching; they are listening; they are paying close attention! They remember things that I sometimes don't. Just days ago, my 7 year old was retelling me of the time when my husband gave his coat to a man who was likely homeless, who was spending time around the dumpsters where my husband worked. It was winter and the man needed a coat. It seemed a simple, easy enough thing to do. My son was probably 2 or 3 years old when this took place and I really don't think we've talked about it since then. But, my son remembered because we did talk with him about it at the time; we told him how important it is to do something even when you are not sure there is much you can do. Apparently, this had a lasting impact on him!
So, my forever lesson and my forever prayer is that I am living in peace with my family, with my neighbors, and with myself! My children are paying attention to what I am doing and what I am saying. They see my reactions to life. They see the peace exemplified! And, they see when peace is not what I have chosen. We are continually living this life in front of our children, even when we are not sure what to do--or we don't feel we have enough time to do what needs to be done. They are watching! Young, impressionable lives are watching mine lived in front of them! Lord, help me to remember to love as You do! Help me remember to have peace in every circumstance. Allow me to live with joy and contentment all the days of my life. And, help me to take every opportunity to teach my children about what matters in this life. Help my children to see you in the every day circumstances!
My 20 minutes is up! My daughter is also up...from her nap, begging for a snack. Laundry needs folded; toys need picked up; Lego pieces need found; a phone call needs to be made; and dinner needs prepared. Life is busy and sometimes difficult to slow down. But, in the midst of my busy life....little lives are watching!
Friday, April 1, 2011
A Position of Peace Or An Angle of Anxiety
As I sit at my computer to write, our house is buzzing with loud, crazy, happy sounds. We have a smaller home and wood floors so sounds are not absorbed so well. All 6 of us are here in the living room. The boys are building Lego's with Daddy and the girls are happily racing from the living room through the dining room to the kitchen and back, half-naked, squealing the entire time. It is loud! You may wonder why I am attempting to compose my thoughts right now. Well, I guess I don't see why not. This is my life, most of the time! And, although the house is loud and somewhat crowded right now, there is peace. There is peace here because my husband and I have peace, therefore our children are able to experience peace.
I am in no way bragging about having peace; I don't always have it. Now, in saying this I am also not trying to suggest that peace is some ethereal state of being that sometimes shows up in our midst...and sometimes doesn't. Peace is a decision. I would say that it's a daily decision, but honestly, I think it is more of a moment by moment conscious effort. I can make a conscious decision to live my life from a position of peace or from an angle of anxiety.
I am convinced that we can have peace in the midst of struggle. I believe we can have peace in times of transition just as much as we can have peace when everything seems settled and smells like a bed of roses. We can have peace during life's ups and downs because we can choose to have peace! Personally, our family is in the midst of some decisions that will lead to transition--and we don't know what the outcome will be. Now, I could allow anxiety to take a firm grasp on my soul and I could experience, emotionally and physically, the side effects of stress. However, I am resting in peace.
I have noticed that when I feel anxious, it is a direct result of my lack of trust in God's best for my life. At times, I allow myself to question whether or not God has good intentions for my life. Admittedly, at other times, I have even come to my own conclusion that God truly does not have good plans for my life. Needless to say, this is not a good place to be. It is no wonder that in low times like these, I am anxious about darn near everything...and it shows. I feel the anxiety; my husband sees the effects of my stress; and certainly my children live in an atmosphere that is not conducive to joy or peace. It really doesn't take long for me to realize that I need to get my act together! There is no magic solution; I have to make the decision to go back to the basics. At the most basic of all my beliefs is God's love for me! He has good plans for my life! I need to turn back to the love and peace of my Father. When I do this, I once again feel peace take its place in the center of my life. If I choose not to, I experience anxiety.
Right now I am choosing peace. This is a really good place to be! Now, every single thing isn't perfect. Every unknown has not been made known. Every question has certainly not been answered. In fact, some circumstances could easily be seen as contrary, but we are choosing to trust in God's goodness. Even when life isn't good...even when life is frustrating...God is always good! He always loves us and He has good intentions for our lives! From a position of peace, everything that I approach as a woman, a wife, and a mother is much more hopeful. Peace lends itself to this hope. Hope reminds me that there are better days ahead and that there are many more great experiences to come. My children, just like me, thrive when peace is in our home--when peace is in their midst. I have found that I can also accomplish even more in my daily life when I am in a position of peace. When I am looking at life from an angle of anxiety, it is difficult to complete even the most menial tasks. But, from a position of peace, I am able! Obstacles, challenges, and transitions are surmountable from a position of peace.
So, as I wrap this up, my children and my husband are obnoxiously singing silly songs while cleaning up a huge pile of Lego's (by throwing them into 2 plastic bins). It has been a noisy hour! We have had wrestling, squealing, bickering, running, crying, and hysterical laughing all the while I've been writing. But guess what? I have peace right now! So, surprisingly enough, I have been able to write an entire blog entry despite contrary circumstances. Writing does my soul good! It's something I love to do; it helps me when I have the opportunity to write. From a position of peace, I am able to conquer just about anything...and you are too!
I am in no way bragging about having peace; I don't always have it. Now, in saying this I am also not trying to suggest that peace is some ethereal state of being that sometimes shows up in our midst...and sometimes doesn't. Peace is a decision. I would say that it's a daily decision, but honestly, I think it is more of a moment by moment conscious effort. I can make a conscious decision to live my life from a position of peace or from an angle of anxiety.
I am convinced that we can have peace in the midst of struggle. I believe we can have peace in times of transition just as much as we can have peace when everything seems settled and smells like a bed of roses. We can have peace during life's ups and downs because we can choose to have peace! Personally, our family is in the midst of some decisions that will lead to transition--and we don't know what the outcome will be. Now, I could allow anxiety to take a firm grasp on my soul and I could experience, emotionally and physically, the side effects of stress. However, I am resting in peace.
I have noticed that when I feel anxious, it is a direct result of my lack of trust in God's best for my life. At times, I allow myself to question whether or not God has good intentions for my life. Admittedly, at other times, I have even come to my own conclusion that God truly does not have good plans for my life. Needless to say, this is not a good place to be. It is no wonder that in low times like these, I am anxious about darn near everything...and it shows. I feel the anxiety; my husband sees the effects of my stress; and certainly my children live in an atmosphere that is not conducive to joy or peace. It really doesn't take long for me to realize that I need to get my act together! There is no magic solution; I have to make the decision to go back to the basics. At the most basic of all my beliefs is God's love for me! He has good plans for my life! I need to turn back to the love and peace of my Father. When I do this, I once again feel peace take its place in the center of my life. If I choose not to, I experience anxiety.
Right now I am choosing peace. This is a really good place to be! Now, every single thing isn't perfect. Every unknown has not been made known. Every question has certainly not been answered. In fact, some circumstances could easily be seen as contrary, but we are choosing to trust in God's goodness. Even when life isn't good...even when life is frustrating...God is always good! He always loves us and He has good intentions for our lives! From a position of peace, everything that I approach as a woman, a wife, and a mother is much more hopeful. Peace lends itself to this hope. Hope reminds me that there are better days ahead and that there are many more great experiences to come. My children, just like me, thrive when peace is in our home--when peace is in their midst. I have found that I can also accomplish even more in my daily life when I am in a position of peace. When I am looking at life from an angle of anxiety, it is difficult to complete even the most menial tasks. But, from a position of peace, I am able! Obstacles, challenges, and transitions are surmountable from a position of peace.
So, as I wrap this up, my children and my husband are obnoxiously singing silly songs while cleaning up a huge pile of Lego's (by throwing them into 2 plastic bins). It has been a noisy hour! We have had wrestling, squealing, bickering, running, crying, and hysterical laughing all the while I've been writing. But guess what? I have peace right now! So, surprisingly enough, I have been able to write an entire blog entry despite contrary circumstances. Writing does my soul good! It's something I love to do; it helps me when I have the opportunity to write. From a position of peace, I am able to conquer just about anything...and you are too!
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